Marriage Jokes and Game Theory

I’m on vacation so my regular article will resume next week. In the meantime, I thought it would be fun to share a few jokes somewhat related to marriage and strategy.

Hope you enjoy them, and feel free to add your favorite jokes in the comment section.

One way to play matchmaker

Father: “I want you to marry a girl of my choice”
Son: “I will choose my own bride!”
Father: “But the girl is Bill Gates’ daughter.”
Son: “Well, in that case…ok”

Next, the father approaches Bill Gates.

Father: “I have a husband for your daughter.”
Bill Gates: “But my daughter is too young to marry!”
Father: “But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank.”
Bill Gates: “Ah, in that case…ok”

Finally the father goes to see the president of the World Bank.

Father: “I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president.”
President: “But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!”
Father: “But this young man is Bill Gates’s son-in-law.”
President: “Ah, in that case…”

Thinking ahead? (from Economist Jokes)

told by Tapen Sinha, PhD
I heard this from one of my professors. To protect him, no names will be revealed. This professor was about to get married. He went to the jewelers to get a wedding ring for his fiancee.

The jeweler told him that he can have the inside of the ring engraved with the name of his fiancee for an additional $20 (remember, this was a LONG time ago).

He said, “But that will reduce the resale value!”

The jeweler was aghast. He said, “How can you say such a thing. You are a butcher!”

“No,” replied the professor, “I am an economist”.

Who holds the power in marriages? (from Sergui Hart’s website)

Judgment Day arrives. God reviews the billions of people assembled, and says, “Welcome to Heaven. Women, go with Saint Peter. Men, form two lines. One line shall be men who dominated their women on Earth. The other line shall be men who were dominated by their women.”

After much movement and shuffling, all the women are gone, and there remain two lines of men. The line of men that were dominated by their women is hundreds, perhaps thousands of miles long. The line of men that dominated women has but one man standing.

God reviews the two lines, points to the long line, and in a voice that echoes angrily throughout Heaven says, “You men should be ashamed. I created you in MY image, and you all were dominated by your mates. Behold! Only one of my sons stood up and made me proud. You shall learn from him!”

God turns to the one man standing, smiles, and says, “Tell them, my son. How did you manage to be the only one in that line?” And the man says, “I don’t know, Lord. My wife told me to stand here.”