How to work for a jerk: 4 tips

Every job seems to have it: the jerk boss. The boss who is stupid, or nosy, or pushy, or worse.

At my first job, I thought I could just ignore the jerk boss, or perhaps escape him by finding a better job. No such luck. At each new job, I would meet another jerk boss.

Some time ago, while I was still a student at Stanford, I changed my attitude. I simply accepted that jerk bosses existed and probably would continue to exist. Rather than fighting them, it would be better to find strategies to work with them.

A little bit of diplomacy goes a long way. Here are 4 tips for working for a jerk:

1. Be tactful and discreet about your anger

I learned this lesson the hard way. During my first job, I vented my frustrations about a boss to a few coworkers. I was misjudged that they would keep silent. Word got around, and my boss never looked at me the same way. It was awkward when we had to work together. I shudder to think my career path was sidetracked by a bit of gossip.

The lesson is that, if you have to work for a jerk, it is important to manage your emotions. Sharing your anger with others is dangerous for several reasons. First, if you talk to someone in the office, there is a chance your boss could overhear it. Second, if you talk with someone who is not trustworthy, your rant might be shared with your boss as part of office politics. And finally, if communicate your feelings in an email, you risk having your words forwarded to your boss. It’s tough to deny your printed words!

In summary, there are many ways to deal with a jerk boss, but sharing your feelings in the office is usually a misguided approach.

2. Find common ground

Perhaps one of the easiest ways to get along with your jerk boss is to humanize the interaction. You may learn your boss is not really a jerk after all.

For a long time my friend at an investment bank was pestered by his boss. He was once relaxing at home on a Friday and called back in the office at midnight. His errand? To print out a prospectus. His boss was flexing his power, that’s for sure.

My friend was subjected to an inhumane amount of work and petty tasks. He had a tough time understanding how his boss operated. That all changed one day after he had lunch with the boss. He learned that much of the hazing was corporate culture, and that the particular annoyances were nothing personal. He learned they shared common interests in chess and soccer, and that the boss actually saw great potential in him. If he played his cards right, soon it would be him hazing the new hires…

Now this lunch didn’t revolutionize the relationship, as my friend was still overworked for another six months. But it did change the interaction as he did not take things so personally.

There are many opportunities to find common ground with your bosses. You can have coffee or snack with them, go to lunch, meet up at happy hour, talk a bit before discussing business, or talk during a company event like a holiday party. It requires a bit of confidence and legwork, but the payoff is well worth it.

3. Have constructive comments during review time

Just because you work for a jerk doesn’t mean you have to be completely passive. Companies often have established channels to improve working relationships.

Perhaps one of the best times to share your comments is during your company’s review time. In a good company, this is a time when everyone’s performance is evaluated. Your boss’s superior may be quite interested in hearing your complaints if they are constructive.

The art is to craft your opinions so they reflect working problems rather than your personal objections. For instance, suppose you are angry that your boss keeps everyone working late on Fridays. It may not be effective to express this in a review-it may come off as complaining and reflect poorly on you.

Instead, think deeper about the source of the problem. Why is it that only your boss keeps people late on Fridays? Is your boss disorganized? Or stretched too thin? Or constantly changing the plan of attack? These are legitimate problems that affect overall productivity and are easier to improve.

4. Make yourself valuable-to other bosses

This technique is more effective in project-based consulting, but it can be applied to other lines of work as well. My friend hated working in due diligence, not because of the work, but because of the boss. He tried everything to make the work better. He had lunch with the boss, he tried providing criticism, but nothing worked. The boss was simply too influential in that practice area and nothing was going to change.

My friend decided it would be easier to change himself than his company. He talked to his coworkers and found that he would also be a good fit in other project areas. Over a six month period he slowly positioned himself to change work lines. First, he would volunteer when another project needed help. Then, he would brush up on technical knowledge. And finally, he networked with the bosses in other projects to add a social dimension.

It might seem like a lot of effort to reposition yourself for a new line of work, but it can be worth it if your new area has bosses you can get along with better.

Conclusion

It’s not always easy to work for a jerk, but it is necessary from time to time. I’ve shared some of my tactics but I know you all must have some tips too.

What are your tips for working for a jerk?

How do you get through the day when your boss is being extra annoying?

How long should you put up with a jerk before telling a superior?

Have you considered leaving your job because of a jerk?